All I Ever Wanted Was You
by LovingJasperHale
Summary: Bella Swan had a troubled past, then she was killed by James. Now she has a very real fear. Edward is no exception to Bella's fear, will she be able to put it all behind her and love him, even if she does, will he be able to accept that she is as vampire?
1. James

**All I Ever Wanted Was You**

It had been almost fifty years.

I knew I was still considered a newborn, especially in the eyes of the Volutri but I had come a long way since I had met Carlisle.

He had found me one night during his hunt, I wasn't as skilled as him but unlike my other encounters with vampires I didn't need to fight.

I was born, I was loved by my parents, I went to school, I went on dates but I was killed.

Killed by this guy I had met at camp one year when Charlie had sent me to a group camp to meet new friends. He seemed innocent enough at first, just curious glances at me but that night I saw him lingering in the forest just outside my bedroom window, I knew he was nothing innocent.

Fate had it though, he changed me.

Was this better or worse than death? I had no idea at the time and I still don't, Sure I have a family now but I was still alone.

James.

The name was a nightmare in itself, he was long gone now. Emmett, my adoring bigger brother had taken revenge a long time ago. I was glad that James could no longer hurt anymore girls and then change them into vampires.

From that one chilling night I was and still are afraid of men. Not all men, just those who had creepy looks about them, the ones who glanced at me really freaked me out and definitely guys who were stronger than me.

Though now in my new stage of "life", "existence" would have been a more appropriate term considering I would live forever if not killed again, deep in my heart, I wanted this nightmare to end. I just wanted to wake up in my room and race downstairs and hug my parents, that would never happen though and I completely blame James for abusing me and taking away my future, my life.

I had a strange way with men now, yeah they would notice me more now with my incredible grace, my elegant poise, the beautifulness of my figure and face had been accentuated by the change.

Everyone was drawn to me, and I hated it.

Still very much afraid of men, Alice and Emmett assured me that I had the strength to take on any human, which was true but the situation scared me so much.

Carlisle had took me in, thank the heavens for him. If not for Carlisle I would have probably ended up on the Volutri guard, and I much despised them.

Over the years our family grew. Carlisle had found his beloved and saved her from imminent death, Esme, my new mother.

Alice had spooked us all when she turned up on our doorstep with Jasper in tow and hugged and greeted everyone like we had known her since birth.

Rosalie had found us shortly after Alice and Jasper got married for the first time, Rosalie found and saved Emmett when she was out hunting.

Everyone was so happy, so together, except me.

I had no mate, completely alone in that respect.

Family was all I had and all I really cared about. As a little girl I had dreamed of living in a house, marrying and having children. Like Rosalie, my dreams of children were crushed. I would never be able to have children, Rosalie and I had bonded over the sadness.

2009, a new year, a new school.

I had stayed at home the previous years when my siblings went to school and tottered off and pretended to be human. I was what the modern world called "home schooled". I preferred not to dwell in places that had heaps of humans, or males.

Esme and Carlisle had drawn the line though.

As hard as it was for Esme to tell me to go to school it was even harder when she had to let me go in the morning of the first day.

"Bella, you're going to be ok. Emmett and Alice are in all of your classes and you will never be alone at school until you want to be and you feel comfortable," urged Esme

"I know mom," I said as I embraced Esme.

"What about me? It's my first day too!" Claimed Emmett.

Esme gave Emmett a quick hug before she nudged him in the shoulder, " You take care of your sister" She told him.

"Let the boys of forks high upset her, I think not. I'll keep her safe." Emmett promised.

"Alice?" I asked, hoping she had seen that my day would be ok.

"Bell you don't need my visions to know you're going to be ok, were going to be there, nothing bad will happen." Alice tried to settle me.

I was normally the one sitting around by myself, reading was one of my favourite past times. Jasper and I played endless games of chess, the only one we couldn't bet was Alice. Future seeing had its purposes, it did.

We had our own little gifts each of us. Jasper had a way with emotions, Alice could see glimpses of the future, Emmett was super strong, Esme had her compassionate and I was what you would call a shield.

I knew long ago what I was, that was why James had picked me out of all the rest. The moment Aro had set his hand upon mine, it was obvious. I would also never forget the look on Jane's face when her "gift" hadn't worked on me; it makes me laugh every time.

I had in fact laughed when it happened; it was the wrong move though. Marcus had to order them to peel Jane off me, lucky I knew my defences or I would have been ripped limb from limb by that blonde pest of a teenager.

Though my defences would not help today, as I stepped into a world full of teenage boys who didn't know of my fear and would probably come and talk to me. Attention would be drawn to me because I was already new but the way we looked drew every eye.

Was I ready for this?

Was I ready when I stepped out of Emmett's Hummer and saw the hell that was called High School right in front of me?

Hell, no.


	2. Healthy

**All I Ever wanted was You**

I sat in the car, everyone was out of the car, I had opened the door and looked outside.

Hell, no.

I saw tons of males!!

My first instinct was to jump into the front seat, hotwire the hummer and take off. The plan would have worked if Emmett wasn't holding my wrists so tightly.

I growled.

"Bella you're going to have to do it soon and if you do it now you, you will make less heads turn then if I have to make you come out."Emmett whispered.

I jumped down and when he was finally sure that I wasn't going to bolt in the next five seconds, he let go. To all the humans, it would have just looked like he had helped me out of his big monster truck.

I growled again, I didn't want to be here.

Much to Alice's distress I wore jeans, she had been at me for the past month to wear a dress, I don't think so Alice, wear a dress and show off my perfect legs to catch the opposite sex's attention, nope, never going to happen and I wish she would just give up.

My family was always the topic of gossip and the object of their misplaced stares, we were considered weird but well feared. It was odd but effective, with the right look no one would come near me.

What I feared most was class, I knew everything there was academically, their human brains hardly held anything but it was more the close proximity between pupils that I feared.

I suppose you could have called us the lion herd that everybody feared but envied. We stayed together, always together and rarely talking to anyone else, it wasn't that the others were scared of people, they couldn't take the risk of them finding out we were vampires.

The dark ages may be over people but that doesn't mean we are accepted yet, there was much folk lore about vampires, none of it kind. Burning at sunlight now that just made me laugh, humans had such a pessimistic outlook on us and bats?

They could never imagine that we are in some sense harmless and have good intentions instead they like to think that we shrivel up in vampire dust at the first rays of sunlight. Far from it, sparkling isn't even close to burning; I wondered where the humans ever came up with such idiocy.

Most of us do like the gothic sort of places and things because that is where we lived while we were human, most of us are centuries old and with the ever modernising world we were nostalgic for the world we lived in.

I stepped into the crowded corridor and felt the push and pull of the sea of students as they hurried to class, their eyes fell on me in questioning glances, whether they were wondering why I was standing like a dumb stick in the middle or who I was, I didn't know.

Alice and I totted off to modern history together; the public story was that we were biological sisters. Most of the people were happy to finally see the mysterious Bella Cullen out in the real world, there was much gossip that I was hideous and felt ashamed to be known to be family to the most beautiful people in town.

That obviously wasn't the case, and was disappointment to much of the female population of forks high. In their eyes I was just some more competition that had killer looks.

I don't bother with makeup, Rosalie and Alice took to the stuff and wouldn't go anywhere without it but I never wanted to draw more attention to myself and makeup was one sure way to draw attention.

I felt their eyes bore into me as I rounded the corner and just went outside, Alice and I sat outside for the whole first hour.

Ditching is healthy, somewhere in the back of my mind said.

Alice was practising some dance move and was twirling around while I was just looking into the forest, not really looking just day dreaming.

I heard him before I saw him, a tall guy had also come out of the same doors that we stood by. He regarded us for a small moment, his green eyes dancing on my face, then walked off.

Alice somehow oblivious to him kept on dancing.

She could sense my anxiety as I watched him walking away into the forest. Why was he going there it was dangerous, there were bad things in the trees, well maybe not as many bad things since I was sitting here with Alice.

So minus two bad things in the forest, for some strange reason I was worried about his welfare and felt compelled to stop him.

Alice sensed my compulsion to go stop him.

"Go on bells." Encouraged Alice.

"But what if?" I began before she cut me off.

"Take a leap of faith, besides he's human, what harm could he do?" She asked playfully, obviously knowing something more and I didn't know what.

I hurried after him with one thought in my mind.

_He could break my heart._


	3. Followed

**All I Ever Wanted Was You**

**Chapter 3 – Followed**

The sound of my feet crashing on the damp grass as I followed him, I was so anxious I felt compelled to run at full speed and pull him back to where it was safe, but my mind shook away that idea and I followed his scent into the edge of the trees.

I saw him sitting on a log, his eyes were down, just staring at the floor.

It would have been so easy for me to leap up into a tree canopy and just watch but I continued towards this stranger, making sure to make my footsteps were now audible to him. His vibrant green eyes dashed up to my figure as he heard me, flashing a smile.

I stopped short of the log, in all awkwardness.

I sighed and sat down next to him, still quite a distance from him to feel some comfort in the situation, I had to be proud of myself though for coming this far.

"I haven't seen you around before." He stated.

"Probably because I haven't been around before," I smiled at him his face held a certain kindness that was similar to Carlisle's so I found myself a bit more at ease by his side.

"First day?"

"Yup." I grimaced.

"And you're ditching already!" He said with a cocky smile.

"I'm never really one for rules, besides you can't talk, you're ditching too." I admitted, not quite sure where this conversation was going.

It had been a long time since I had talked to humans and I wasn't quite sure how to react to them in their petty conversations anymore, to me and my family half the stuff they say is just nonsense, gossip was a big part of that nonsense.

"Why did you follow me?" He asked, changing the topic.

He caught me off guard, I should have expected this question but I was so wrapped up in him that my mind hardly seemed coherent. He didn't seem angry that I had invaded his space but more curious at my interest.

I rattled my brain for a reason; none seemed to jump out at me.

"I didn't mean to intrude, I'll just go, "I said, keeping my voice controlled, not giving away any emotion.

I was on my feet ready to go but I heard my name.

He had said my name, my name had danced on his lips.

"How did?" I stuttered.

"I just do." He said, so sure of himself.

He was on his feet now, his black backpack draped over his shoulder, " Edward Mason." He said.

"Edward.." I said, trying out the words on my lips.

"I'll be looking forward to seeing you again." Edward said as he picked up my hand and I froze, I became like a statue.

Edward could feel it, I know he could feel the stiffness in my frame and the ice cold temperature of my skin, but his expression displayed no shock at this, he gently kissed the palm of my hand and I couldn't help but smile.

I watched as his figure headed towards the school and finally disappeared into the corridors.

I sat on the log, a gentle kiss from a complete gentleman, I had a smile plastered to my face when Alice finally jumped down from the tree she had been watching from.

"What do I do Alice?" I asked completely confused.

"How about lunch?" She asked, Alice seemed to enjoy the human façade more than the others.

"You know what I mean." I retorted.

"I do and I can't see anything just yet but just don't do anything you're not comfortable with." Alice said, her tone worried.

Now that was one can of worms I didn't want to open, I had heard it a thousand times, only do what you were comfortable with, it was annoying but with my past it was key to keeping me sane.

Memories of the nightmare hours before I was changed flashed in my mind and I quickly shut them out, human memories were supposed to be easy to forget but no matter how I tried, I couldn't escape them in my mind.

I dwelled all the time about what happened, not that anyone knew how severely depressed I was besides Jasper who tried to soothe me, but I had told him not to. It was unnecessary, it was a constant emotion that I was plagued with, not just at some intervals.

After pushing the memories back, my mind became more understandable.

"Have I really been sitting here that long?" I asked.

"Lunch will start soon and I think we should get to some classes because I see a very upset Esme if we don't." Alice warned.

"I can't say I'll go to both but I'm going to try." I admitted, in full honesty.

"That's all we want Bells." Alice said with a smile.

"What do you know about Edward?" I asked.

"Single child, great grades with a bit of a bad side, incredibly handsome." Summarised Alice as though Edward was some sort of clothing item.

"Bad side?" _Great that's all I need, it would be hard enough to be around him but a bad side, I don't think I could handle that, it would bring back memories._

"Not to any extreme, definitely not one to sleep around, Edward is more the ditching class and saying what's on his mind, and I know what you're thinking, he has never been in a fight." Alice said, knowing exactly what was key to my assessment of Edward.

"Not too bad then." I agreed.


	4. A Scene

**All I Ever Wanted Was You**

**Chapter 4 – A Scene**

Alice and I settled ourselves in the normal table that my family sat at, waiting for the bell to go.

"Human speed, it's so slow." I said, a little annoyed how even now that there was no one around that we had to drag ourselves to their level of speed so we would fit in.

Alice flashed me a helpful smile, "It doesn't seem so bad after a while, then we can just go home and go at any speed, which reminds me, sunshine on Friday."

I sinister smile crept up on my face, only two days to get through and then I would have the whole day to do whatever, what would I do?

I was plotting ideas when several things happened at once, the light rain pour turned into a storm, the bell rung and the rest of my family were now with us.

"Speed." Alice warned.

"Alice you know no one saw, they were too busy picking up their books." Rosalie said.

"How's my lil Sis? The men of forks giving you any trouble?" Emmett asked in his usual playful tone.

"I'm not too sure, we ditched first and then I meet someone." I admitted.

"Do I need to tell them to take a hike?" Asked Emmett.

"If you do hopefully not where we are going tonight." Jasper mentioned.

This distracted Emmett with his plans of getting a grizzly bear for a moment, giving me a chance to absorb the changing surroundings, people had filled in to the tables and were throwing curious glances over at our table, there were one pair of eyes that I found drew me.

Edwards'.

As I drew my sights out of the pools of his dazzling emerald green eyes, I noticed that he sat alone.

"Ah....Edward Mason." Rosalie said, she had been undistracted by talk of hunting but had followed my line of sight.

Her voice made my vision take in not just Edward but the whole scene in the cafeteria, I was the captured sight of most of the males in here, I felt myself stiffen at this.

I turned around back to face my family, I could feel the familiar wave of calm tingling my senses.

I hissed and it disappeared.

"Let me help." Jasper emphasised.

I just nodded, the waves splashing over me and I absorbed them and felt incredibly calm.

I looked at my family, their face held no sign of emotion but their eyes were clear with worry.

"What's on the menu?" I asked.

"Elk." Rosalie said, with disappointment.

"We could always do a run and get something a bit more appetising, I do feel like a change." I admitted.

"You're on!" Smiled Emmett.

I felt excitement boil inside me, it had been a while since we had tried anything new to our diets.

With our hearing we can hear almost everything, the murmur of rumours flooding around about me were something I pushed out of my mind, they could think whatever they wanted, it didn't bother me.

Jasper's waves of calm vanished as I heard someone say the dreaded name, it was stupid on my part because I know James was long gone but his name still inflicted fear of the highest degree in me.

"Bella, Bella!" Alice called trying to grab my attention but it was too late.

The barriers that had filled my mind, holding the pain back, came crashing down like they had been constructed of nothing but feeble material.

_It's coming again_ was all I could think.

"Get her out of view." Alice shrieked.

We were all on our feet, my vision clouded, Emmett walked next to me, with his arm around my waist, leading me to a safe area.

Once out of human vision Emmett picked me up and we ran, for how many miles I didn't know.

The pain had began and the darkness settled itself over me, I succumbed to the screams that were building up in my throat.

As I screamed and thrashed around in utter pain, the only thing linking me to my surroundings were the hands of my family that tried to soothe me.

It held no comfort to me, the pain was too strong, like my insides were ripping apart.

My screams taunting my family as they tried to calm me, but it was useless.

I was surrounded by the dark, the pain, and him, my screams the only sound audible to my ears.


	5. Eyes Of Pure Desire

**All I Ever Wanted**

**Edward's Point Of View**

**Chapter 5- Eyes Of Pure Desire**

Math, yuck.

It may be my best subject but I hated every minute, especially today, my mind was elsewhere.

My mind, still captured in her golden eyes...

Her deep brunette curls flowing to the small of her back, she was simply the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.

I had admitted to myself when I first saw her this morning that I had no chance in hell that she would ever be interested in someone like me, I was good looking to some degree but her beauty matched and excelled those of her siblings, adopted or not.

I was utterly surprised when I glanced up to see her beautiful figure not too far away, I could tell from her stance that she was uncomfortable which made me curious.

What was she doing here and why did it make her feel so uncomfortable? I thought to myself as she sat down on the same log that I was already sitting on.

I wasn't sure if Bella could feel it or not, but there was what felt like an electric current ripping between us, I was urging to reach out and touch her but I restrained myself.

Moments ticked by as we exchanged a few pretences, her golden eyes seemed to swirl in their own depths, and I was captured instantly.

Captured by Bella Cullen.

Bella stood up to leave but I called to her, shock played on her features at my use of her name, I was sure she could hear the audible adoration in my tone.

I felt myself sink into her eyes and the electricity built to a degree that I couldn't resist touching her any longer, I felt stupid in a way to let myself touch her so surely and so fondly when clearly she wasn't comfortable.

Bubbles of happiness coursed through me at the contact of our skin, my lips burned with desire as I pressed them gently to the palm of her hand, the look in Bella's eyes made my worry of being so prompt fade away, her eyes were filled with desire.

I gave her a smile and I headed towards school, I felt bad leaving her there just like that but I knew Alice wouldn't have left her sister alone, even though I couldn't spot her anywhere, I trusted my gut that she was there.

I made it in time for second hour, gym.

I chose to run laps and I let my mind wander back to her, I drifted on to what sets her apart from other people of our age. It is true that her whole family is different from the rest of us, all sharing a tortured past which left them orphaned, they always kept to themselves though they were never rude about it, they just seemed intimidating.

Especially Emmett who I was pretty sure could take down all of the football team with one swing, he was just that strong.

If approached the Cullen's' would be nicer to you than most people and it wasn't the sort of fake nice, you could tell it was genuine.

But Bella Cullen, there was something there, something different, I couldn't place it. Not that it made me feel uncomfortable or anything like that; I was still just as curious.

Lunch began before I knew it, stopping by my locker to swap my books and then straight for the cafeteria; my eyes instantly fell upon her. I didn't stop and gawk to make it obvious but I grabbed some food and sat at an empty table, one table where I could look at her occasionally without it looking suspicious.

I bite into my sandwich as I observe her, I couldn't hear a word that was coming from any of them but they seemed to be happy at whatever the topic they were talking about.

Just as I was beginning to feel bad about staring, she turns slightly and looks straight at me, a smile spread across her face. In that moment, my whole world consisted of Bella and me.

Her eyes drew me in, I was beginning to think that maybe I should go and talk to her , but she turns away. The world becomes as one again and I see that Rosalie is looking at me too, then turns back to Bella, her mouth moving and I wonder what is being said.

Moments later as I stuff down another bite, I see Bella stiffen and I feel a little angry at Rosalie because it seemed that her words had upset Bella.

I watched for a few more moments before she seemed to settle down, Natalie came to sit by me now.

Natalie wasn't the snobby type of girl, or the type of girl who only took interest in me to date me, Natalie was simply a close friend that I had made a few years ago.

"You do know it's rude to stare?" Natalie taunts me.

"Might have heard it someone before." I smirk.

I give up on watching Bella for now and surrender to my hungry stomach. Stuffing down the rest of my sandwich before asking Natalie about her morning.

"Surprise test in history tomorrow was made all that less surprising when Miss Tyler gave us the papers today instead of our assignments, now at least I know what to study so I won't fail. Which reminds me, you ditched, lucky she was too preoccupied to notice you weren't there. Where did you go? " Asks Natalie.

"I had to catch up on some work."

"I bet you were reading in the forest again." Natalie says.

I don't reply but give her a smile and she knows she is right.

"Whoa, something's happening." Announces Natalie, her tone worried.

I look up to see what she means, not too eager since it probably is some sort of popularity fight but I see the Cullen table in her line of sight, all of them were on their feet hurriedly exiting the building, Emmett gripping Bella around the waist protectively as though there was some kind of threat. Jasper by her other side, Bella didn't look up as she walked right past me but I could see her face, it was completely pained and her eyes, to my absolute shock, were black.

Then they were gone.

"Now that was bloody weird!!" States Natalie at my side.

I don't reply instantly because I am rattled by what I saw, a feeling of unease looms over me as I wonder what could have possibly sparked such a response from the Cullens. I must have imagined Bella's eyes being black, I knew for sure that they were a honey golden.

Worry clouds my head, worry for Bella.

"Did something happen before?" I ask.

The rest of the student body didn't seem to notice what had happened but a few did, this might be a source of hot gossip in coming days. I sigh at the thought.

"No, nothing that I saw. They were just talking, then the new girl, Bella I think her name is went rigid and the rest did too after a few seconds, then you saw them walk off. I wonder what happened though." Natalie explained.

"Her name is Bella." I said.

Natalie made a face.

"What?" I ask, puzzled.

Natalie gives me a smile, " You like her." She accuses.

"I barely know her." I say.

"Ha!"

I realise that Natalie accepted my answer as confirmation.

"Well, maybe." I say.

"I'd say definitely by the look on your face." She teases.

Her comment never reaches me, too wrapped up in my thoughts, the unease still looming and growing with every second that passes until I know for sure that Bella is well.


End file.
